when someone walks into a room where you are playing piano and they are very surprised to see you playing the piano
"We Could Have Named The Song After A Part Of The Chorus But Fuck That" by Panic! at the Disco
Okay no. Fucking no. You think your sandwich is cute with peanut butter and jelly hearts, fucker? Well you’ll change your mind once you put it together and try to eat it. First you’ll get a mouthful of just bread and disappointment, then when you take another bite your mouth will be assaulted by copious the amounts of sticky peanut butter and sugary jelly and there won’t be enough bread to save you from it. A sandwich like that is what failure tastes like. The pb and j may be shaped like hearts but there’s no love in that sandwich. It’s about balance. Life needs balance, and so does your fucking sandwich. You disgust me. Don’t talk to me until you know how to make a proper sandwich.
goodbye stranger, it's been nice; hope you find your paradise.
This sums up my relationship with most people I know.
somebody actually asked them to do this like they walked up to them in person and asked with their voice for them to do this and they said okay this actually happened
WILL SOMEONE JUST GIVE CAS A CUTE FLUFFY PET ALREADY
the worst part about ugly dudes is everyone defends them like ‘he’s really funny though’ or something but if a chick is ugly to someone they just straight up dirt like they might as well not even have a personality
If there’s one thing I’ve learned from reading fanfiction, it’s that clear communication will save you at least three chapters of angst.
wanna know what a cow looks like washed and blow dried?
that is what a cow looks like washed and blow dried